Don’t Mess With Jennifer Lopez

For all that she tries to hold on to her “from the block” street cred, Jennifer Lopez will sue your pants off if she needs to, and make money while doing so.

A court-appointed arbitrator has ruled that Jennifer Lopez’s first husband, Ojani Noa, should pay her nearly $545,000 for his plans to write a tell-all book.

The award was revealed Monday when Lopez’s attorney, Paul Sorrell, filed court papers asking a Los Angeles Superior Court judge to confirm the decision in a hearing scheduled for Sept. 5.

The decision would put an end to Noa’s plans to publish the book, which was to be titled The Unknown Truth: A Passionate Portrait of a Serial Thriller.

Noa’s book was to detail his first sexual encounter with Lopez, as well as claims that the singer had multiple affairs while they were married.

I grew up with a lot of girls who are exactly what Jennifer Lopez claims to have been, and I’m pretty sure that if any of their exes were planning a tell-all book, they would be stripping off their rings and pulling their hair back, not calling up their retained team of crack lawyers. They also probably could have come up with a better title for any book they’d hypothetically write than “The Unknown Truth: A Passionate Portrait of a Serial Thriller” too, though. How does a book about Jennifer Lopez end up with Fabio being a requirement for the cover? Was Danielle Steel the ghost writer?