Paris Hilton Doesn’t Even Try To Make Sense

Paris Hilton’s newfound dedication to the environment took a hit this week when it was revealed that - shockingly! - the heiress has no idea what she’s talking about whatsoever.

Paris Hilton told Larry King that, postjail, she wants to do good.

First up?

“I ordered a Hummer hybrid,” she told Us.

Really?

“Such a car doesn’t exist,” a Hummer spokesman says.

Still, Hilton, 26, has deep thoughts on the environment.

“I’m going to start putting tips for kids on what they can do to save the world” on MySpace.

When reached for a comment, Paris said “Blueberry toaster fishtank speedway!” She then flashed a peace sign and her vagina.